Accept what you can and cannot control
One of the hardest parts of living with someone else's drinking is realising that you cannot make another person stop. You may be able to encourage, support and listen, but the decision to change belongs to them.
Accepting this does not mean giving up. It means recognising where your responsibility ends and theirs begins.
Look after your own wellbeing
It is easy for another person's drinking to become the centre of your life. Your own health, friendships, interests and happiness matter as much as theirs.
Looking after yourself is not selfish. It gives you the strength to cope with whatever happens next.
Learn about alcohol dependence
Understanding how alcohol affects thoughts, emotions and behaviour can make confusing situations easier to understand. It does not excuse hurtful behaviour, but it can explain why promises are often broken and why change can take time.
Decide what your boundaries are
Healthy boundaries are about deciding what you will and will not accept. They are not about controlling someone else.
Everyone's boundaries are different, but having them can reduce uncertainty and help you protect yourself.
Talk to someone you trust
Many people keep alcohol problems secret for years. Sharing what you are experiencing with someone you trust can reduce isolation and help you see your situation more clearly.
Remember that you are not alone
Families affected by alcohol often feel isolated, yet millions of people have lived through similar experiences. Support is available, and many people understand far more than you might expect.