Yes, people can stop drinking
People do stop drinking, including people who have been drinking heavily or have been dependent on alcohol for many years.
How difficult stopping is, what help they need and what happens afterwards will be different for each person. There is no single route that works for everyone.
They have to recognise that something needs to change
It is difficult to change something you do not believe is a problem. They can blame work, stress, relationships or other people for what is happening while continuing to see alcohol as separate from it.
Recognising what their drinking is doing does not mean they will immediately stop, but it gives them something they can begin to change.
They have to want to stop
Other people can want them to stop. Their partner can want it, their children can want it and their family can want it. They can be offered advice, treatment and support.
In the end, they have to make the decision to stop drinking themselves and take part in whatever is needed to make that change.
Stopping drinking and being sober are different
Stopping drinking is the beginning. Being sober means learning how to live without alcohol, including dealing with the feelings, situations and problems that drinking may have helped them avoid.
Some people stop and never drink again. Others relapse and have to begin again. A relapse does not mean that everything they achieved while sober has been lost or that they have failed. It means something needs to change in how they are managing their sobriety.
What matters is what happens next. A return to drinking can become a return to the old pattern, or it can be the point at which they recognise that they need more or different help.
They may need help to stop
Deciding to stop does not mean they have to do it alone. Help can come from a doctor, alcohol treatment service, counsellor, recovery programme, support group or a combination of these.
The help they need depends on their drinking, their health and their circumstances. Needing help does not make their decision to stop any less real.
They may be afraid to stop
Alcohol may have been part of their life for years. Stopping can mean facing feelings, problems and situations they have been using alcohol to avoid.
They can also be frightened by the thought of life without alcohol. Even when they know drinking is causing problems, what comes after stopping can feel unknown.
They may want to stop but cannot do it alone
They can mean it when they say they want to stop. The regret, apologies and promises can be genuine, even when they start drinking again.
Wanting to stop and knowing how to stop are different things. Repeated attempts that end in drinking again can be a sign that they need more help than determination alone can provide.
Physical dependence changes how they should stop
If someone has become physically dependent on alcohol, suddenly stopping can cause serious withdrawal symptoms. These can include severe shaking, confusion, seizures and hallucinations, and in severe cases alcohol withdrawal can be life-threatening.
Someone who may be physically dependent on alcohol should get medical advice about stopping rather than abruptly stopping on their own.